The cost of not giving re-directional feedback

People are generally at the extremes of a spectrum when it comes to giving re-directional feedback. They either end up damaging people by giving feedback in a blunt manner or clamming up because of fear.

I was doing a session on feedback and team member performance development conversation last month when I shared this image as a precursor to introducing the participants to the neurological levels framework from Robert Dilts's work in NLP.

This was the simplest infographic I could find in a sea of complex images that showcase what all lies beneath the surface of behaviour.

Well it triggered a profound insight in one of the participants.

He wanted to confirm if not calling out bad behaviour, tolerating it and not giving re-directional feedback will only strengthen the negative loop between a person's internal beliefs and their external negative behaviour?

I said yes.

And said further that, that is why managers are responsible to give feedback in case of inappropriate behaviour and align people to higher order values and beliefs through a proper conversation/ experiential process that leads to the appropriate behaviour.

Otherwise, tolerating such behaviour under the convenient umbrella of misplaced-compassion will only normalise such behaviour and lead to a toxic environment and attrition, among other things.

(Image source: http://www.coaching.net.nz/how-not-to-act-insanely/)



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